That Day, I Almost Got Shot
In Dec. 2018, I had an encounter with the Knoxville Police Dept. that I don’t know if I will ever shake, because I wasn’t sure I was going to survive that day. After months of being harassed, stalked, antagonized by someone that my ex was cheating on me with, this person decided to plow their car into mine at full force and run me off of the road. Neither of the 2 white cops had any interest in hearing my side, because as soon as I started to SPEAK, I watched this all too eager and aggressive coward reach for his gun, and all I could see in my head was the pictures of the man featured below. As an afro-Latino trans man, who is also on the autism spectrum, and has complex PTSD and several other health issues, my adrenal system does not regulate itself properly. When I have an adrenaline surge, (even for something good) it can get so intense that I get shaky and disoriented and have trouble speaking. As soon as this guy reached for his gun, I felt it; If I would’ve said one more word, I would’ve blacked out. So, I stopped talking and did everything I could to control myself before I too became a statistic.This is not the country that I want to live in anymore. As much as I love the people in my life, it’s increasingly difficult to watch so many ignorant white people having the time of their lives while traipsing all over the lives of the rest of us. The work that I do, in all of my jobs, is geared toward organizing and building power, because NO ONE deserves to spend their entire life living in fear the way that I have, yet millions do and have for far too long. In the south, you’re taught to not question authority because it’s impolite; fuck that. You know what else is impolite? Racism and allowing abuses of power to remain unchecked for any reason.We are the point where we have to work together to dismantle the systems of white supremacy, and it needs to start with these colonist slave catchers finally facing real accountability.Anyone who doesn’t want to be a cop because of accountability or facing consequences for heinous actions, doesn’t deserve to be one. Until we have a system, which doesn’t rely on mass incarceration, fear, violence, and death while destroying the lives of the very people it’s supposed to protect, don’t expect my support for anything else.